001 - Beggars can't be choosers.[]
Renoir “Ewww!!!”
Renoir “Your cooking skills suck! You call this a pizza??? It tastes like cardboard paper dipped in wax!! There’s even a nail in it!!!”
Raph “Shut up. I didn’t have enough ingredients!”
Renoir “Then improvise competently!”
Renoir “Look, there’s egg (kinda old), onions (wilted), flour, and lots of sauce!!”
Renoir “There! Egg-pizza ultimate mix!!!”
Renoir “I’ll have the first bite!!!”
Raph “...”
002 - Give me relief.[]
Renoir “M...Master... Can you give me some pills?”
Raph “No. It’s your own fault you ate that damn pizza!”
Renoir “That’s it! Let me die and rot all alone!”
Renoir “You heartless monster!”
Raph “Here! Enjoy it, ya noisy brat!”
Renoir “Life is so pretty!”
Raph “At times like this, science is a true blessing.”
antidepressant drug
003 - Medical care.[]
Raph “...And next thing I knew, he became addicted to my drugs and started takin’ ‘em in my back.”
Renoir “Life is pretty!”
Donnie “I see. At this stage of his addiction, we must take drastic measures.”
Donnie “Let’s first put him to sleep for now. Then I’ll check him.”
Raph “What’s with that face, Donnie?”
004 - "For Great Science!!"[]
Donnie “Pass me a syringe.”
Raph “Here.”
Donnie “Blood.”
Raph “Here.”
Donnie “Scalpel.”
Raph “Here.”
Donnie “For science.”
Raph “No.”
005 - Second thoughts[]
Renoir “Man... I dreamed that I was simply extremely happy for no reason...”
Raph “Renoir!”
Renoir “Wait... This is plain wrong!!”
Renoir “Me, happy with living in this stinky hole?”
Raph “...”
Renoir “I... I have no future!!! I’m doomed to live with...”
Renoir “...This aggressive old fat mutant! Nooooooo!!!”
Renoir “Yay! I love my life!”
Raph “It’s better this way. Trust me, Donnie.”
006 - Collecting samples[]
Raph “Damn..I’d better stop giving you happy drugs.”
Renoir “*Barf*!”
Renoir “W...What drugs, Master?”
Renoir “Eh?”
Donnie “Samples!”
Ziploc™
007 - Specimen[]
Donnie “...”
The real thing.
Donnie “Renoir, come”
Renoir “Don’t come near me!”
008 - Asking kindly[]
Donnie “Renoir...”
009 - Dutiful Master[]
Donnie “For Science”
Donnie “COME HERE...”
Renoir “Help! He wants to dissect me!”
Raph “Do you have a set of our usual civilian costume?”
Renoir “Here you go.”
Renoir “No!”
Raph “I’m gonna go buy some booze.”
Raph “I’ll be back in a minute.”
010 - "Violent Behavior"[]
Renoir “You maniac!”
Renoir “Whoa! Sorry! I didn’t mean to hurt you! Are you okay?”
Donnie (Renoir developed a violent behaviour...!)
Donnie (Could it be because he adapted himself to Raph’s personality?)
Donnie (How... Fascinating...!!!)
Donnie “Now I know where I should start dissecting!”
Renoir “Noooo!”
011 - Equivalent trade?[]
Renoir “Enough!! Leave me alone, you freak!!”
Too much stress
Renoir “Ugh... *Baaarf*”
Donnie “...!!!”
Donnie “I’ll let you go today... But I will come back for more...”
Renoir “I... I’m scared...”
012 - Assessing the situation...[]
Renoir “That old bum drank himself to sleep again... I bet he won’t even notice if I do this...”
I have issues
Angsty
Hobo
Emo
Old man
Renoir “You have no proof that I did it, “Master”.”
Raph “Who is the only person who lives in my lair other than me, Renoir?”
Renoir “...”
Renoir “It’s... It’s water soluble Master! N... Not permanent! F...Forgive meeee!”
013 - A writer's influence[]
Shadow “Wow... So many fanmails... Don’t you sometimes get hatemails too, Unc’ Mikey?”
Mikey “Yeah, but they’re usually so poorly written that I’m not a bit affected by them.”
“DEER M.WANABEE RITER YOO SUK I Hete YOOR StORYS”
“I HAV Not Reed them buT I KNO ther bad cuz I KNO YOR A Wusse. -no NAmE”
Renoir ““Don’t offend my favorite author, scum! Die!” Do you usually have people dropping hateful mails in the sewers?”
Raph “Shut the hell up, Renoir.”
014 - Different lifestyles[]
08:23
Raph “...”
23:42
Renoir “Zzz...”
09:36
Raph “💢︎”
09:37
Renoir “Zzz...”
015 - Food chain logic[]
Renoir “Master! It seems turtles do not eat meat... So how come we’re eating pizza?”
Raph “When we mutated, our diet mutated too.”
National Geographics
Donnie “So, how do you like my soft shell turtle soup, Raphael? Not bad, huh?”
Raph “Delicious!! But... I’m still hungry!!”
Renoir “T...Turtle soup??”
Raph “Let’s have seconds!”
Renoir “Arrrgh!”
National Geographic
Special Turtle Issue
016 - Casey Jones, gallant vigilante[]
Casey “Yo! I’m Casey Jones!”
Casey “My job is to beat up criminals and help needy people!”
Casey “I’m gonna help ya carry this heavy piano to your apartment, April, or ya gonna break a nail!”
April “Thanks for helping, Casey, but don’t say such silly...”
Casey “...No. ‘Tis okay. As a man, I take great pride in helpin’ powerless women like you.”
April “...”
Casey “And I took the rear of the piano so ya can feel superior for oncel... ‘Cuz I know self-confidence ain’t innate for women. Ain’t I gallant?”
017 - Writer's block (1)[]
Mikey “I need to come up with an original character for a new show... But I’m out of ideas...!”
Tofu Dish
Soya Sauce
Shadow “That’s my Tofu-Kongfu, Defender of Vegetables! You can use him if you want.”
Mikey “I’m not that desperate.”
018 - Writer's block (2)[]
“In the name of King Vegetable, I will punish you!”
Renoir “Man, this show sucks.”
019 - Discovery of the "Monkey"[]
Renoir “Huh?”
Raph “Why did ya bring back a stupid spiky ball made of paper?”
Renoir “No! Can’t you see? It’s a monkey!”
Renoir “The cones are of different lengths to represent energy!”
Renoir “It’s like an unstable ball, ready to burst any time... With a tail! Just like a monkey!!”
Raph “D...Damn kid... Messin’ up my mind... I’ll double the dose this time...”
Renoir “Don’t you like art, master?”
Raph “Renoir... Come here for a second...”
020 - Prankster[]
Raph “Renoir, why the hell did’ja turn over the cushions on my sofa?”
Renoir “Huh? It wasn’t me.”
Raph “Stop lyin’ dammit!! If I didn’t do it, who did it, huh?”
Raph “Ya stupid prankster!!”
Renoir “M...Master! It wasn’t me! I swear! S... Stop stomping on my bleeding head!! P... Please!!!”
Renoir “It wasn’t me!!!”
021 - Donnie has imagination too[]
Krankbella “Oooh! Donatello... It was a wonderful night... I thought you’d never ask!!”
Donnie “Oh... Krankbella... You know I love...”
Donnie “...Dissecting highly intelligent beings! Especially Utroms!”
Krankbella “Aaah!!! A paralizing ring???”
Donnie “...For science...”
Krankbella “Noooo! Aaaaaah!”
Donnie “And it ends with the protagonist stating that any sacrifice for the sake of science is worth it...!”
Erase
Erase
Erase
Erase
Ideas for Stories
Mikey “T... Thanks, Donnie. I’ll use your ideas... I will...”
022 - Davianna's melancholy[]
Raph “...Sorry.”
Davianna “Why... Why did you fool me into thinking you were Augustus?”
Davianna “I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!”
Davianna “I hate you!”
Davianna “I hate you!”
Davianna “I hate you!”
Davianna “Ah...!”
023 - Happy pills[]
Renoir “What?”
Donnie “You heard me. Raph has been secretly drugging you with antidepressant pills.”
Renoir “How... How can this be... Why me...?”
Donnie ““Raphael is a closet fan of cereals”. You probably didn’t know that, eh?”
Donnie “Feel free to use this information is any way you want.”
Raph “Life is so pretty! Weehee!!”
Renoir “The tables turned, “Master”... The tables turned...”
024 - Get tempted[]
Renoir “Ah!! Master, you are not eating cereals today?”
Raph “Err... No. I recently realized I had an unhealthy addiction to cereals... With side effects.”
Renoir “Oh no! I just opened this box by accident!”
Choco Delight
Limited Time
(Taken from Raph’s secret stash)
Renoir “Hmm! This is so good!”
Renoir “Better eat it while it’s still crunchy!”
Raph “...”
Yummy
Samples ♪
Samples ♪
Renoir “F...For my pranks... It... It was worth it...”
025 - Let's do it again![]
Raph “Renoir! I give in! I can’t live without cereals!”
Tears of joy. He missed cereals.
Raph “Gimme a bowl of cereals!!”
Tears of joy. He missed drugging Raphael
Renoir “Roger that, Master! Alriiiii...”
Renoir “...iiiiight...”
Happy pills
Donnie “Samples!”
026 - Eyes of truth (1)[]
Mikey “Raph! Why won’t you stop sending me junk mail!! Don’t even pretend you didn’t do it! I can recognize your grammar and handwriting - they’re worse than a kindergarten kid’s!”
Raph “Oh shaddap, Mikey! Why would I even bother lookin’ for your stupid fanmail’s address? Just thinkin’ ‘bout writin’ somethin’ to ya makes me wanna puke! In fact, get outta my lair! You’re an eyesore!”
Renoir “One has pupils in his eyes... The other doesn’t... Whaaaaaat??”
Renoir “Awawaa!! I don’t get it all!!”
Renoir “Tell me! Tell me! My eyes... My eyes!!! Aaah!!!”
Renoir “Am I gonna go blind?”
Raph “Shuddap!! You’re annoyin’ me!!”
027 - Eyes of truth (2)[]
Ugya
Raph “Don’t ask.”
Raph “Existential Questions”
028 - Eyes of truth (3)[]
Renoir “Donatello, you are a scientist, right? How come our eyes don’t have irises when we wear masks?”
Donnie “Hmm...”
Donnie “You mean...”
Donnie “Unlike mine?”
Renoir “Wah!!”
Renoir “Show me how to do that!”
Donnie “Step right in, Renoir. All your questions will be answered.”
Experiment Pod # 1
Raph “...”
029 - More science is good?[]
Raph “My... My cereals!!”
Donnie “I threw them all away and replaced them with dry fruits. You need more vitamins.”
Shadow “Kyaa!! What the !@&*!!!”
Renoir
Donnie “I’ve installed a ventilation system that will get rid of excessive steam in your bathroom. Happy?”
“Email from Donnie: This disk formatter will improve your PC’s performance. It auto-runs, so by the time you read this, it will be done!”
Mikey’s PC
Mikey “My work!! It’s all gone!! I worked 48 hours straight on it!!”
Mikey “Donnie...”
Raph “Donnie...”
Shadow “Uncle Donnie...”
Donnie “G...Guys, you can all thank me later... Okay?”
030 - Casey Jones, errand-vigilante[]
April “Hey, Casey, can you go get a package at the post office for me?”
Casey “Oh, sure, April.”
April “Waaait. Have you forgotten something? (Hint: Normal customers don’t wear masks and bring weapons with them.)”
Casey (Wait... I didn’t forget anything, which means...)
Casey (She’s desperately trying to feel useful by talking to me for no reason! I must cheer her up!!)
Casey “I took too many weapons, so put these away for me and your purpose will be fulfilled... Happy?”
Casey “You’re a nice woman who’s not useless.”
April “That’s not what I meant, you damn chauvinist!!”
031 - Burning passion[]
Renoir “Master! I challenge you!!”
Raph “R... Really?”
Renoir “Run all the way to New Jersey in less than 3 hours!! Beat my record!”
Raph “Gwahahaha! I won’t lose!”
Renoir “Hahaha... Dumbass.”
Raph “Ya lil’ shit! Who do ya think I am!! I’m gonna kill ya!!”
032 - Flimsy mask[]
Samples!
033 - Passion for inspiration[]
Day 1
Mikey “I’m reading books about the occult for inspiration, but I need total immersion, so don’t disturb me for a while, okay?”
April “Okay, but be careful, Mikey.”
Day 5
Do Not Disturb
Shadow “Dad... I’m worried...”
Day 6
Mikey “I know the meaning of life now!!”
Day 7
Donnie & Raph “...”
034 - Kaijuu attack![]
Davianna “Haha! I just returned from Japan and I brought back Godzilla! Fight for great justice!”
Donnie “Ultrakame is here!”
Donnie “Specium beam, ready!!”
April “This is turning out to be a real battle royale! Who will win?”
Shadow “Since when do you work for Channel 6, Mom?”
Raph “This... This doesn’t make sense.”
035 - Collective mistake[]
Leo “This calls for a last resort!”
Raph “L... Leo?”
Leo “All people of Earth! Lend me your energy!”
Raph “Dragon Ball...?”
Raph “Holy sh...”
036 - Reboot![]
4th wall-breaking crayon with the power to restore the world
Shadow “How about another drink, my master.”
Wants to kill someone
Is on a power trip
037 - Byebye sensei... again.[]
Mikey “I can’t believe it! Someone brought us back to life!”
Splinter “My sons...”
Splinter “I... I don’t know how I was able to come back, but... I’m glad to see you...”
Donnie, Leo, Mikey & Raph “Master Splinter!!!”
Splinter “Ah.. Aaah!!! I... I’m disappearing!”
Renoir “I just realized this old geezer was supposed to be dead. Let me fix this.”
Erase
Erase
Erase
038 - Abstract sensei[]
Leo “I went to Renoir’s crash site... And this is all what was left of the pencil... It’s our last hope to bring back our Sensei.”
Raph “No way!”
Donnie “No samples?”
Mikey “Hey, Leo! Leave drawing the Sensei to me! I have no problem drawing wtih just a pencil’s lead!”
Leo “Ah... Alright. I’ll trust you, Mikey.”
Mikey “It should be fine! I was a comic book artist in one of my previous lives (Archie Comics)!”
Mikey “However, in this universe, I’m just a novelist who likes modern art...”
Leo & Raph “Idiot!”
Picasso Splinter “My... My sons... Why am I so hideous?”
Donnie “Picasso Sensei?”
039 - Woes of Picasso Splinter[]
When Splinter wants to listen to classic Japanese music...
...He can’t because he doesn’t have any earholes.
When Splinter takes a walk in the sun (on rooftops) he suffers sunstroke on one half of his body.
Dark half attracts heat.
Bright half doesn’t.
When Splinter wants to drink green tea...
... He can’t grab his cup because he doesn’t have any thumbs.
Nudge!
When Splinter wants to do hara-kiri with an eraser...
Leo “Sensei!! No!!”
Picasso Splinter “My sons... Let me end my life with dignity...!”
040 - Temper control[]
Donnie “Raph! My hologram generator flickered during your training, but that’s no reason to chuck it against a wall!”
Raph “I don’t care. Fix it yourself.”
Mikey “Raaaaph! It’s not my netbook’s fault that Google associates your name to the word “emo”! Why did you punch the screen?”
Raph “I don’t care. Fix it yourself.”
Leo “Raph, we need to talk about your attitude as of late...”
Raph “I don’t care. Fix it yourself.”
Mikey “Well, it’s Leo we’re talking about here...”
Leo “Don’t you ever stray from the path of honor and respect again.”
Raph “...Point taken.”
Renoir “Master got pwned...!”
041 - Balanced Diet[]
Carole “Hello, Mr. fat actor! Is my brother there? I’d like to ask him for an example of a balanced diet for my homework.”
Carole “Oh? You want to help me instead, sir?”
Carole “You are saying that the teacher will put a gold star on my homework if I write that?”
Carole “Okay. Okay. Thank you, sir.”
Name: Carole Amherst
Monday Pizza
Tuesday Pizza
Wednesday Pizza
Thursday Pizza
Friday Pizza
Saturday Pizza
Sunday Pizza
Renoir “Master! My sister is upset about not getting a gold star or something... Do you know anything about this?”
Raph “No one calls me fat and gets away with it.”
042 - Blind Socializing[]
<admin> LOV3RB0I has entered chatroom.
<LOVRB0I> yo, any pretty girls in here?
<n00bLOVR> hey
<LOVRB0I> hello ASL?
<n00bLOVR> 16/F/brooklyn lol you?
<LOVRB0I> 20/M/in your dreams
<n00bLOVR> just 2 let u know im not easy 2 get
<LOVRB0I> kk lol i know how i can make you happy ^____^
<n00bLOVR> liek what
<LOVRB0I> my love will be all u need. ur missing it in ur life but u just dont know it yet.
<n00bLOVR> ...
<n00bLOVR> sFDUSIGFASDULIFSDHL
<n00bLOVR> RENOIR!!!111! WTF R U DOING ONLINE SCREWING AROUND???????? IM TRYING 2 LURE OUT PEDOPHILES!!!111!!
<LOVRB0I> omg shadow?????
<n00bLOVR> GTFO R ILL COME AND BEAT U UP /W MY BASEBALL BAT!!!111!!!!1!!!!
<LOVRB0I> lolololol i wanna see u do that :)
<n00bLOVR> UR GONNA REGRET THIS!!1!!!
<admin> n00bLOVR has left chatroom.
<LOVRB0I> lololololololololol
<admin> redhead has entered chatroom.
<LOVRB0I> hello ASL?
<redhead> 16/F/manhattan. what r u doing?
<LOVRB0I> lol im hiding from a retarded emo old guy. hes really dumb tho and he wont look in his own room 4 me.
<admin> redhead has left chatroom.
Raph “O HAI LOVRB0I. READY 2 DIE??”
043 - Ninjas are human too[]
Eikichi “I brought some food for your night shift.”
“How kind. Thanks, boss.”
KFC
Eikichi “Hey! Who told you you could remove your masks??”
“But to eat...”
Eikichi “You’re on duty! Remove your masks and you’ll pay with your lives!!! Got it?”
“(Sigh)...”
“I hate this job.”
044 - WRONG PARTY!![]
Renoir “Party time!!”
Mikey “Me too! I love parties!”
Mikey “Party!”
Renoir “Party!”
Mikey “Party!!”
Renoir “Party!”
Casey “Shame on you, Mikey.”
Mikey “Wh... What have I done...?”
045 - Emoticon talk[]
[]
Leo “Raph! Stop smoking! It’s bad for you!”
Raph “Buzz off, Leo.”
Raph “I’m a mutant turtle. This won’t kill me, my mutant genes will heal my lungs.”
Leo “...”
Leo “Are you trying to lose weight by smoking?”
Leo “If that’s the case, there are other ways, and...”
Raph “Am.. Am I that fat??”
Mikey “C’mon, that was a low blow... Even Raph didn’t deserve that.”
Leo “I guess I hit the truth...”
047 - Raph's willpower[]
Raph “I’ve decided to take care of myself! No more cigarettes, junk food, or booze!”
Mikey “Salad and orange juice? Wow... Raph...”
Day 1
Mona Lisa “I brought pizza!”
Mikey “Yaaay!”
Day 2
Casey “Yeah, alcohol and tobacco party!!”
Juice
Day 3
048 - Remove it for proof!![]
Shadow “I wonder what made Uncle Mikey so cheerful all of a sudden...”
Without mask = Serious
With mask = Funny
Shadow “Wait... That’s it! I need proof!! I need to remove...”
Renoir “...You need to remove your panties to prove that you’re really a girl!!”
Shadow “Yes!! I need to do that to prove that...”
049 - Raph's weight control[]
April “Pizza time, guys!!”
Mikey “Yeah! Pizza!!!”
April “Oh, Raph. I heard you were on a diet. Here’s a delicious salad for you. Don’t eat pizza, okay?”
Raph “You’re jokin’... Right?”
Mikey “Yummy”
Renoir “Ha ha ha”
Leo “This is good.”
Raph “It’s all your fault!!”
Renoir “Ugya!!”
050 - Writer's block (3)[]
April “Mikey! You have to come up with a new idea for a show!!”
Mikey “Bu... But I quit!!”
April “They threatened to sue for break of contract!”
Shadow “Dad! I put that spaghetti in the fridge so I could bring it to school tomorrow!”
Casey “Oh, sorry, Shadow.”
Shadow “It’s okay. I’ll just make a sandwich!”
“Dad, that spaghetti was mine.”
“Sorry.”
“Oh, but it’s okay.”
Renoir “Man, this show sucks.”
051 - Behind the eye[]
Mikey “Hey, Raph, can you show me your scarred eye?”
Raph “Huh? Errr... Awright.”
Raph “Here ya go.”
Barf
Mikey “Eeew... That was unpleasant...”
Raph “That’s my line, ya idiot!!!”
052 - Enter the Mona Lisa[]
Mona Lisa “Oh hi there, fellow mutant!!”
Mona Lisa “My name is Mona Lisa and I’m from another dimension... I seem to have accidentally drifted into yours!”
Mona Lisa “Well, until help comes, I’d like to see what my “boyfriend” Raphael looks like in your world!”
Renoir “?”
Mode: Female mind analysis.
Mona Lisa “Wha... What is it?”
Renoir “You’re lying. You’re looking for another guy ‘cuz you never were officially together with your ex.”
Mona Lisa “Actually, yeah. That’s why I was only in a single episode.”
Mona Lisa “Raph completely forgot about me...”
053 - Slight misunderstanding.[]
Raph “*Thump*”
Raph “*Thump*”
Raph “*Thump*”
Raph “*Thump*”
Girls
Leo “H-Harder, Raph...”
Renoir “S-Sir..? ...Are you hearing that too? ...Is it what I think it is? T_T”
Leo “Faster!”
Raph “*Thump*”
Raph “*Thump*”
Leo “Gnnh!”
Leo “Harder!”
Mikey “Hum? Raph and Leo? Yeah, they’re just going at it today!”
Raph “*Thump*”
Renoir “They used to do that before, too??”
Mikey “Of course!”
Raph “*Thump*”
Raph “*Thump*”
Raph “*Thump*”
Raph “*Thump*”
Raph “*Thump*”
Renoir (Oh God, this gives a totally new meaning to the panties I found in Raph’s room...)
Raph “*Thump*”
Mikey “You know what? I think I’ll join in! I haven’t in a while...”
Renoir “Aaah!”
Mikey “How’s training going, guys?”
Raph “*Thump*”
